6 PRACTICAL WAYS TO DEAL WITH ANGER

Anger is a normal, healthy emotion. But it becomes unhealthy when it flares up all the time or spirals out of control. Negative anger has

serious consequences for your relationships, your health, and your state of mind. The good news is that getting anger under control is easier than you think.

Anger is a very powerful feeling that can happen when you are frustrated, hurt, annoyed, or disappointed. Anger can help or hurt you, depending on how you react to it. If you can react without hurting someone else, it can be a positive feeling.

If you hold your anger inside, it can lead to passive aggressive behavior like ''getting back'' at people without telling them why or being critical and hostile toward yourself and others. Knowing how to recognize and express these feelings in appropriate ways can help you handle emergencies, solve problems, and hold on to meaningful relationships. 

Like any emotion, anger is conveying a message, telling you that a situation is upsetting, or unjust, or threatening. So, while it’s perfectly normal to feel angry when you’ve been mistreated or wronged, anger becomes a problem when you express it in a way that harms yourself or others.

When you’re angry, you might feel anywhere between a slight irritation to rage, so here are 4 ways that could help you in dealing with anger.

1.                Pause:

When you feel angry about something, it’s almost impossible to deal with the situation in a productive or helpful way. If you feel yourself losing your cool, just walk away from the situation for a while. You’ll deal with it better when everyone, yourself included, is feeling calmer.

2.       Count to 100:

I know this one seems pretty basic, but it works trust me, I can’t count how many times this method has worked for me. Thinking about something other than what’s making you upset for 100 seconds can help you avoid blowing a fuse. It gives you a chance to gather yourself and your thoughts before you do anything else.

3.       Listen:

Listen not to respond but to understand. This can be quite difficult when you getting upset, but Listening can help improve communication and can build trusting feelings between people. This trust can help you deal with potentially hostile emotions. A useful communication exercise is to say to someone, “Let me make sure I understand what you’re saying” and then restate back to them what you perceive as their main message or point of view. Often, this approach helps to clarify misunderstandings that can lead to frustrations, and help identify issues on which you may ultimately “agree to disagree” without turning into a fight. Practice good listening skills.

4.       Just Don’t!

When angry, avoid using recreational drugs and drinking alcohol, which can make you less able to handle frustration.  Yes, a lot of people say they drink to help them calm down , but in reality what happens is at that moment when you drinking you are distracting yourself from the negative emotion just like the counting to 100  technique we discussed.  Alcohol can loosen your inhibitions so that you say or do something you normally would not do.

5.       Support Systems:

Get support from others. Talk to someone about how you feel, not someone you know very well would support you even when you are wrong, find someone who is practical and unbiased. Talk through your feelings and try to work on changing your behaviour. Try to gain a different perspective by putting yourself in another's place.

6.       Learn to be assertive:

Learn to express your feelings calmly and directly without becoming defensive, hostile, or emotionally charged. Read self-help books or seek help from a professional therapist to learn how to use assertiveness and  anger management skills. 

Although expressing anger is better than keeping it in, there’s a right way to do it. Try to express yourself clearly and calmly. Angry outbursts are stressful to your nervous and cardiovascular systems and can make health problems worse.